By Laura Medina
With the General Admission price for one weekend of Coachella going for close to $500 and with Gen-Xer-sque favorites Madonna, Alabama Shakes, and Fritz & the Tantrums, alongside Baby Boomer classics, AC/DC and Steely Dan...all night for three night, one definitely get her and his Rock n' Roll Wet Dream on. Still at that admission price alone...with those line-ups...and gourmet food trucks and catered celebrity-chef dinner banquet, "Outstanding in the Field," Coachella is definitely for the Bourgeois Bohemian Establishment, the same folks now ruling and running the Grammys.
The authentic tweeny-bopper/teenaged kids oughta be thankful their parents paid for the tickets and patiently wait by the side to chauffeur them in and out of the festival, happily missing out on the action. Those adult parents patiently putting themselves out to pastures so their kids can rock out like faux-adults.
For real adults,...since you're gonna rock it like an adult because the price alone is adult, you might as well surviving the festival as an adult.
After plunking down the estimated $500 weekend general admission ticket, one must learn how to survive. Especially, if you're one of the thousand international attendees playing and musicians and DJ working the festival, where we're gonna stay? How do we get there? How do I live while at the festival?
If you're really smart about it, go to Valley Music Travel on Coachella's http://www.valleymusictravel.com/events/coachella2015/hotel-travel-packages-weekend-two/#agua-caliente-casino-resort-spa page.
Coachella (after sixteen years running the festival and encountering every travel problems there is) is thoughtful and considerate enough to offer hotel and transportation/shuttle bus and van packages with certain hotels in retro-hip Palm Springs (adding more coins to their coffer) where the locals do all the work for you so you wouldn't be stressed out, just relax and enjoy the musicians all night long then hopefully return.
For those who rough it during Coachella, The Parker Hotel in Palm Springs has some square and fair one-day deals for those who sacrifice, by Coachella camping.
For the severely dehydrated and sun-burnt, The Parker Hotel's "Are You a Spa Junkie?" Deal can scrub off the gritty granola off your grimy skin.
What you pay for an one night stay pays for your spa treatments in equal amounts, a fair deal right?!
Sunday through Thursday nights for rates starting at $249 you will receive $250 in credit towards spa treatments in the cool Palm Springs Yacht Club, as well one of our divine Estate Rooms. This equates to paying you $1 for a room.
In other words, they'll exfoliate and pamper your environmental-damaged skin back to normal, refreshed enough to face civilization.
If you practically starved yourself for Coachella, whether keeping it in budget or starving to fit into those skimpy bikinis, you can feed yourself back into sanity at The Parker Hotel.
The hotel's "Glutton's Delight" rebalances your metabolism and your mentality by again, for the same amount you pay for an one-night stay, it'll be match in equal amount of meals to nourish you back to normality.
Remember the olde-fashion advice, the way to a man's (now, a woman's) heart is through the stomach. Show you care by booking "Glutton's Delight" one-night deal and feed that special person happy. One cannot live on anorexia nervosa alone. Your sun-damaged skin needs omega-3 oils and fluid to plump up and hydrate; and a starving boyfriend is an angry boyfriend. Show him you care by thanking him with The Parker's "Glutton's Delight" for him making all those Coachella sacrifices.
Now that you fixed the basics of food, water, shelter, and transportation, let's start dressing like an adult for Coachella.
For the ruling establishment of Gen-Xers and a few remaining Baby Boomers, especially Baby Boomers who wore the skimpy, "Dirty Hippy" the first time around, way back at Woodstock, how to dress appropriately in the heat, sweat, and dust storms without being trapped in a time capsule?
Sure, doing yogilates help but you're cultured and experienced...ok, your parts grew and settled into places that can't rock a lacy, transparent caftan laying over a skimpy bikini. Just the act of rocking a pair of Daisy Dukes, over the age of thirty, is an achievement unto itself.
You can rock stylishly and be fashion-forward without dressing like a stale time capsule. Save the fringe suede and beads for the first-time young'uns. Besides, any experienced jet-setter knows a good travel/vacation/festival wardrobe should cross cliques and coasts.
Easy, in Palm Springs, stock up on native Palm Springer and Coachella supporter, Trina Turk.
She's the West Coast answer to Lilly Pulitzer. For sheer convenience, The Parker Hotel has her pop-up in the lobby until July the 4th. This pop-up shop is special because it carries only her limited-edition 20th Anniversary Collection.
Once done with Coachella, you can still style Trina Turk at Charleston's Spoleto USA arriving in late May/early June, which is not too far off.
Now, plan and prep Coachella like an adult so you can be relaxed enough to be open-minded enough to discover and catch newcomers, like Azealia Banks and Florence & the Machine. This is how you keep young, young of mind and soul.