By Laura Medina
There couldn't be more whining and crying than ever before among successful, accomplished, achieving adult women, complaining about the lack of men or the lack of well-mannered, matured men. The adult "males" out there are inconsiderate, rude...douchebags, successful-on-the surface men who know they can get better and treat well-meaning women like disposal trash.
It takes a true gentleman, a real "man's man," to stand up for and protect women. He's psychologist, speaker, author, mentor, coach and facilitator, Gunter Swoboda who treats and "trains" men to be better men.
Behind every man is a good wife and partner, fellow mentor, coach, and philosopher and clinician, Lorin Josephson helps and assists her husband, Gunter, making men adjust to this new masculinity, manhood, and economy.
A year and an half ago, Gunter made a soft splash in Los Angeles, discussing how men, today, aren't adjusting too well to the new economy that women are doing so well in. He said the solution should be focusing on the men, never blaming women or victimizing women. That's not being a man. No. He focuses on training men in "surfing" the new wave of masculinity, that benefits everyone, http://www.goodmengreat.com/blog-medium/
Among professional women, over the age of thirty, are complaining about the lack of common courtesy, Lorin pointed that the decline of manners are, one of many reasons, in making men ill-mannered and ill-suited in today's society and for ill-fated relationships and marriages.
At his end of the spectrum, Gunter said that today's "boys," the men that no woman ever wants, lacks social skills. They weren't trained to read body language or know that "personal space" does exist and constantly break personal space without permission, enough to make women run away or issue restraining orders. Social skills is masculine.
Lorin said that the world cannot be all-men nor can it be all-women. We, as a society, cannot afford to be lopsided, imbalanced, one-gendered. We both need each other to survive. Paraphrasing Lorin, women will initiate the changes but men need to step up to carry the changes further.
Being the "man's man" that he is, Gunter commented that this eon-old lopsided, one-gendered patriarchy is has been making women meaner yet weaker and men sicker in today's 21st-century society and economy.
The "douche bags" that many a women are complaining and crying about and suffering with, is of privilege, not true power. Privilege are perks, certainly, not power. Boys abuse and hurt women and children. True power comes from real men. Men are responsible stewards of the land, traditionally, or a company in today's world, and protect, defend, care, and practice common courtesy.
He cites the hit TV show "The Games of Thrones" the reason why patriarchy is failing society. With the men gathering all the perks, this causes women to be dependent on them. When dependent on men, the women become dishonest and conniving. "The Game of Thrones'" Cersei Lannister is a prime example of women using, not loving, in order to have some say. This eon old practice has evolved into today's "mean girl" that hurts everyone, both men and women, to the point of no true friendship or partnership. This is not "girl empowerment." This is why back-stabbing "frenemies" and douchebags co-exist in today's society. We all know how we feel about those "toxic people."
We all know Cersei isn't the greatest mother because her children grow up to be so rotten, people think getting rid of them, is greater for the common good.
Today, fathers who don't man up and moms who connive, give rise of unhappy children, who repeat the cycle for future generations.
Speaking of "toxic people," Gunter is not afraid to mention Hollywood in why there are way more douche bags than anywhere else but it's a growing phenomena, unfortunately.
In Lorin's lecture, Gunter's "better half," she cites what makes a Great Man. Empathy, not narcissism, is what makes a great man, a smarter man. A great man has a noble life purpose through sweat, blood, and tears, not platitudes. Most importantly in today's society and in Hollywood, a great man has self-confidence, independent of others' approval. He's not rude but he doesn't play for the high school popularity contest; and he certainly doesn't sacrifice others to get ahead in that game.
If we need to more know from Gunter and Lorin, we'll learn more from his upcoming book, "Making Good Men Great."
Gunter is on a mission to make good men greater and better.
